Anna S. (eliade) wrote,
Anna S.
eliade

Damn...

I was going to do the squick meme (gacked from soobunny) because I've been watching so many memes float by lately without being able to muster any interest, and also because I just watched three episodes of Charmed in a row, and my brain is huddled over there on the floor, bug-eyed and quivering and holding a gun to its frontal lobe, so I wanted something to distract it.

But after writing a while, and mincing my words carefully, and still feeling deep wellsprings of bitchiness rising, I realized with frustration that I was not going to be able to give replies without offending every. single. person. I. know.

It's kind of sad. I mean, I'm a fairly live-and-let-live kind of fangirl most days. And yet when it comes right down to it, I want writers to cater to my precise and very finicky needs--and apparently everything else in existence ticks me off. Who knew?

Dark stories, unconventional pairings, fringe fandoms--yep, hate them all, except for the ones I approve of, like a whimsical queen. I want to let rip and scorch the earth clear of all of that junk, and plant gardens of fresh smut perfectly color-coordinated and arranged to my tastes.

Sometimes, you just have to back away from the rant, because it's so pointless. I'd froth for a while, and then five minutes later I'd get over it, and people would be staring at me with huge, hurt, angry eyes, and I'd be like, "Hey, I just wanted to slag off for a bit--I still totally respect your freedom to write stuff that I can't bring myself to read," and people would be like, "Ha ha, we understand, Anna! Now please! Go away and DIE, YOU FLAMING HELL-COW, DIE!"

Sigh. Restraint is hard, and boring, but it's the better virtue. Perhaps I can just sum up my feelings with these simple rules:

  • My fandom is big and hairy and cool. Yours is tiny and lame, like a shaved, crippled lab rat, and you should put it out of its misery. Here. Use this pencil.
  • My unconventional pairing is sexy. Yours, again, is lame.
  • My dark story is the correct shade of dark. Your dark story? Is creepy. Please seek therapy and stay away from children.

    There. Now I've said it. Shun me! Shun me hard!
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