I woke up this morning and decided that's it. I'm leaving my body. Its wild mood swings, the lies--pretending to be starving to death just to get that piece of coconut pie--its refusal to fall asleep, its constant need to pee--really, just the overall shocking way it's aged over the last twenty years--I can't take it any more. It calls me "cerebral." I call it a tapped-out lazy self-indulgent whore. You think I'm being harsh, but I've been living with it for thirty-six years, plus that whole time-share womb period. Let's just call it irreconcilable differences.
If anyone knows where I can meet a nice body, twenty-two to twenty-four, with moderate hormones and a decent rack, please let me know. Thanks!