?

Log in

No account? Create an account
 
 
26 October 2005 @ 06:50 pm
crack-addled scrabbling  
I've decided I'm going to circumvent the historical debate over (mis)usage of the word "drabble" and invent the word "scrabble" to mean short purposeless scribbling of no particular length, because the available alternatives don't quite work for me. "Comment fic" and even "crack fic" more or less imply coherent form, a beginning and an end, and "snippet" suggests that it's part of a larger whole, and that more is coming. (Ha ha ha!) From what I can tell there's really no fannish word for "a jotted bit of crackheaded drivel that will never become anything more than what it is." And I think we need that word.



Rodney was painting his fingernails. There were several things wrong with that picture, some of which leapt to mind like gazelles, others of which crept through the tall grass like quiet lions. Oddly the first leaping wrongness was who in the hell used their property allowance to bring nail polish to another galaxy? And then his mind began flipping irrelevantly through a mental Rolodex of possibilities, which had to be pared down against a list of who the hell Rodney would accept nail polish from. Elizabeth, strike. Cadman, strike. Heightmeyer...okay, short list.

None of this distracted him as it should have from the actuality of Rodney painting his nails. In the mess hall. He--god, was this the defining moment when John should start using feminine pronouns? screw that--he, Rodney, was reading some symbol-laden document on his laptop with an unwavering gaze, yet seemed to be managing to paint with perfect accuracy. The average observer might be led to speculate about genetics, gender, and fine motor control, but John had more than once seen Rodney dismantle and reassemble complex multilayered sandwiches while staring zombielike at his screen, so that wasn't really the issue.

Rodney was painting his nails. Pink, John noticed. Or maybe some more specific color like "Coral Reef." He tried to imagine Rodney's tendency to expound at length on miniscule nuances in quantum field theory translating into the incomprehensible passion that some of John's old girlfriends had held for such things, but he sprained himself with the contortion that thought required.

He went over with his tray and sat down. He sometimes dreamed of coming up to Rodney in the mess hall and sitting down, usually to have long conversations about missions and the Cartoon Network. Apparently this scene was symbolic of something in his life, encrypted in mundane details. Then again, possibly just a regurgitation of junk from any given day. He also dreamed about ducks a lot.

"How's it hanging?" he heard himself say, before his face froze in discomfort.

"Yes, fine, make jokes about my neutered state," Rodney replied, snappish and tight-mouthed, and yet--on a squint of inspection--more unfazed than John would have expected. He looked only about thirty percent diverted from what he was reading, the rest of him solidly lost in abstraction. John often imagined the inside of Rodney's head as an Escher maze with a dozen conflicting sets of blueprints.

"Sorry. That just slipped out." John began eating his macaroni in what he hoped was an apologetic manner.

"Well, I'm sure Herr Freud would have something to say about that. Fortunately for you, I think Freud is one of the most pernicious charlatans of our age, a quack whose sloppy reasoning has led countless disciples into fallacy, and who is at root responsible for incalculable damage to young and tender minds--and to their parents. I mean, as they say, sometimes a cigar is just a cigar, just like sometimes a fear of horses is nothing but a fear of horses. An entirely rational fear, by the way. Why does it have to mean anything else? And don't get me started on the anal-retentive theory of character."

"I won't," John said earnestly, as Rodney paused to catch a breath.
 
 
 
superheroes failing at oatmeal: jews! in! space!some_stars on October 27th, 2005 02:04 am (UTC)
*ceaseless laughter!!!*

quiet lions! SPRAINED himself!! dreaming about DUCKS!!!!!1


*many candied hearts for yoooou*
Anna S.eliade on October 27th, 2005 03:21 am (UTC)
*jumps up and down holding hands with you* Your glee englees me! I can only sustain a force of glee for about 3.5 seconds lately, but I prize those seconds. *g*
Mireillemireille719 on October 27th, 2005 02:04 am (UTC)
From what I can tell there's really no fannish word for "a jotted bit of crackheaded drivel that will never become anything more than what it is." And I think we need that word.

I've tended to call them "fic-bits," for want of a better term, but "scrabble" is perfect.
Anna S.: cat-adorableeliade on October 27th, 2005 03:22 am (UTC)
Though not to be confused with Speranza's amazing Due South Scrabble story, which it only occurred to me belatedly. :)
(Deleted comment)
Anna S.: harry-pottereliade on October 27th, 2005 03:23 am (UTC)
My first-born?

Argh! No babies!

*flees*
(no subject) - tingler on October 27th, 2005 06:02 am (UTC) (Expand)
(Deleted comment)
Pet: Nick smilingapetslife on October 27th, 2005 02:11 am (UTC)
I have an unholy and possibly unnatural amount of love for that icon.

And the fic is fabulous too.

*grin*
Anna S.: dh-and-dogeliade on October 27th, 2005 03:24 am (UTC)
I have an unholy and possibly unnatural amount of love for that icon.

TINY CRANKY TURTLE RODNEY! I love with the white-hot heat of a thousand suns.
(no subject) - eliade on October 27th, 2005 03:30 am (UTC) (Expand)
Raven: Kissy Choraveninthewind on October 27th, 2005 02:26 am (UTC)
*inhales the story crack*

So.much.fun! Mwah!
Anna S.: elijaheliade on October 27th, 2005 03:23 am (UTC)
Thank you! :D
JustHuman: jdjusthuman on October 27th, 2005 02:35 am (UTC)
I love your scrabbles - scrabble is a good word :-)

...but what would the variating scrapple be? Everything but the oink mixed with cornmeal... There's got to be a fic equivelant
Anna S.: cat_chickeneliade on October 27th, 2005 03:25 am (UTC)
..but what would the variating scrapple be?

Scrapple is a horrifying bastardization of the basic "food" concept, and so a written scrapple would be...um. Scrabble badfic? Hm.
all right, so you're nonchalant: he gets the other one all riled uprunpunkrun on October 27th, 2005 02:54 am (UTC)
CUTE scrabble. I like how John sees Rodney.
Anna S.: polarbeareliade on October 27th, 2005 03:26 am (UTC)
Thank you! He also sees him as Elisabeth Shue, but I decided not to mention that part.
Moxie Brown: SGA: David Hewlett's a Camera Whoremoxie_brown on October 27th, 2005 02:54 am (UTC)
Oh, that was great! Rodney taking his gender swap with aplomb.

Also, your icon made me laugh and laugh.
Anna S.: puppy-eyeseliade on October 27th, 2005 03:26 am (UTC)
Some cultures believe that the weight of the world is carried on the back of the turtle. Which seems so...apt.
abbyleeabbylee on October 27th, 2005 03:01 am (UTC)
ah! ah! ah!

"...I mean, as they say, sometimes a cigar is just a cigar, just like sometimes a fear of horses is nothing but a fear of horses. An entirely rational fear, by the way. Why does it have to mean anything else? And don't get me started on the anal-retentive theory of character."

♥ love ♥
Anna S.: john-sultryeliade on October 27th, 2005 03:27 am (UTC)
♥ love ♥

*reflects the love with a cunningly held mirror*
childermasschildermass on October 27th, 2005 03:11 am (UTC)
wikipedia states that a drabble is exactly 100 words, but then they backtrack at the end and say "Some stories, called 'drabbles' by their authors or readers, total as much as 1,000 words in length. However, a more correct term for this type of fiction is 'flashfic'." hmmm. :p
Anna S.eliade on October 27th, 2005 03:15 am (UTC)
D'oh! Flashfic! Of course. *facepalm*
(no subject) - eliade on October 27th, 2005 03:17 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - childermass on October 27th, 2005 03:28 am (UTC) (Expand)
Zoë Rayne: sgaz_rayne on October 27th, 2005 03:15 am (UTC)
Hee.

I love it so very much when you make Rodney a girl. *g*
Anna S.: rodney2eliade on October 27th, 2005 03:28 am (UTC)
And I love you and all your Rodney variations and your Rodney...ing. Rodney as a verb. A vibrating verb in the hands of Zoë. :)
(no subject) - z_rayne on October 29th, 2005 01:17 am (UTC) (Expand)
julia_herejulia_here on October 27th, 2005 03:55 am (UTC)
Personally, I think this comes under the heading of divertissment.

The vote at my house is three "The turtle looks just like Rodney" to one "Who's Rodney?"

Julia, Dammit. You made me read Stargate fic!

Very inconvenient, as now I have no shaving-glassdzurlady on October 27th, 2005 04:08 am (UTC)
There were several things wrong with that picture, some of which leapt to mind like gazelles, others of which crept through the tall grass like quiet lions.
BWAH! I'm enjoying these little random snapshot-y type scrabbles. Especially the gender bending ones. Hee.
the upper echelons of mediocrity: Rodneythe_star_fish on October 27th, 2005 04:44 am (UTC)
Bweeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!
cathexys: thoughtcrimes (by isilya)cathexys on October 27th, 2005 11:39 am (UTC)
i'm not sure whether i should be gleeful about the new word coinage or sad, b/c that means there won't be more of this....

wonderful details and nuances and just...perfect :D thank you, and now i do hope that helen and you are right and that genderswap's the new thing...