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10 May 2005 @ 02:23 pm
quote of the day  
From my AA meeting: "Loneliness is the darkroom where alcoholics develop their negatives." Love that. I think it applies more widely.

Jack and Vaughn continue to do sluttish things in my head. I actually jotted dialogue notes on the back of an envelope over lunch. That is a dangerous sign.

I suck at work. Not literally. Unless I have a lollipop. But I'm trying to get in the right frame of mind. To focus, to have energy. The owner of the cafe where I get lunch told me today--when I said I was still tired from being sick--that I should say to myself, "I have energy! I'm not at all tired!" And it would just fade away. Yep.

I do love her, but I often distrust advice like that. About working at things from the outside-in. I should get over that. Life can imitate art--and artifice, and artfulness. Coincidentally I'd just acknowledged that to my therapist yesterday, but I'm not sure how much I believe myself. I often feel like things happen actively in my life when I'm not forcing them. Then again, many things have taken practice and effort, like working out. It's like, you have to gently nudge something forward, and then try to relax and let the current take it, occasionally sticking your hand in the water and gently adjusting your direction.

I overflow with platitudes. But not platypi, i.e., small carnivorous aquatic oviparous mammals of eastern Australia and Tasmania with fleshy bills resembling those of ducks, plus dense fur, webbed feet, and broad flattened tails. No, wait. I was wrong. There are platypi everywhere! Save me!

No, wait, wait--wrong again. I didn't mean platypi, I meant SGA stories! Ha ha! Silly me.

(Deleted comment)
Anna S.: jack-oneilleliade on May 10th, 2005 09:39 pm (UTC)
What?! You better be teasing me, wench.

*tackles you to floor*
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Anna S.: porny kangarooeliade on May 10th, 2005 11:16 pm (UTC)
Link me to the penguins. Go on. Do it. Do it!
viverra_libroviverra_libro on May 10th, 2005 09:48 pm (UTC)
I understand what you mean about not trusting the platitudes. It's not logical that you'd just *say* something and then have your thinking change. The thinking part should come first! But I have found that despite all my attempts to impose logic on the workings of my brain, that a lot of what we think and even believe deep down inside can be changed unnervingly quickly via the use of affirmations. Which is what that is.

The other really weird part of affirmations is that you really don't have to believe them; you just have to say them over and over and over. Eventually, the brain just kind of re-writes itself.

Of course, if you are actually sick/tired due to physical reasons it won't matter if you say "I have energy" 'til you're blue in the face -- you'll still be sick/tired.

But affirmations? Scarily effective, IME.
Trepkos: pensivetrepkos on May 10th, 2005 10:28 pm (UTC)
Absolutely - advertising works.
I am often amazed at how often I hear people repeat back to me something I said, or something they heard on TV, as if they thought of it themselves.
How much more effective it must be if you are actually consciously trying to make something true for you.
It's very easy (especially in the UK, I think) to fall into the habit of replying to a "How are you?" with a "Not too bad" or "bearing up" or something equally negaitve-sounding. I decided that was ridiculous, and now tend to say "Spiffy" or "absolutely fine" (which can irritate people!)
That may not work for you, but maybe if you just consciously try and put a positive spin on things..."Doing better" etc.
But don't make yourself work when you are really sick or tired.
Maybe something in your office block makes you tired - too much/too little fresh air or heat or humidity?
ex_dovil323 on May 10th, 2005 11:07 pm (UTC)
The brain is a fairly malleable thing up to a point and oh so powerful. See, look, I bend this paper clip with the power of my mind, and my fingers, but mostly my mind.

There's all these little elecrtical impulses buzzing about up there and if you can learn to retrain your brain the way you see things can also shift. I went from 'oh god, I've missed the bus, this encaptulates everything about how sucky life is, oh wowers me' to stopping myself and wagging my finger metaphorically at myself. At least I hope it was metaphorically though it could explain why nobody ever wanted to stand next to me in the bus queue. And you just learn to shrug your shoulders and think well crickey another bus will be along the road of life and it's just not important in the scheme of things. And sometimes you have to let things go and realise you can't control them. Even if I get upset over something I can't use the power of my brain to bring a bus any quicker though you should see what it can do with paperclips. So you shrug your shoulders and just let these things go. Or you go out and build your own bus, but that's another more complicated story.

Oh my god, what the hell am I on about. Erm, be happy! 'Context', 'Perspective' and 'Crack Cocaine', the three key words to a happy life. And if anyone touts anything that says that happiness can be boiled down to three things, don't trust them as far as you can throw them. :D

It's a case of going 'Ahhhh!, I get it now', and different strokes work for different folks. It's true, it was even a tv theme song.

I shall stop now and go drink coffee. Now that really is the key to happiness.
ex_dovil323 on May 10th, 2005 11:13 pm (UTC)
Oh, and take all that with a HUGE grain of salt. Because different circumstances have different implications on the whole deal, and while that kind of thinking helped me out that was me and certainly doesn't mean that I think that's all there is to it for everyone else. Because that would be patronising, and bad!

You can tell that I'm now looking at what I just typed with big eyes and slowly back peddling can't you. But look, big eyes, I'm so cute!
Anna S.: cat_chickeneliade on May 10th, 2005 11:14 pm (UTC)
You're so cute. *g*
Pamgoosegirl9 on May 11th, 2005 06:33 am (UTC)
:hugs: For everything.

I love the darkroom analogy. (I hope that was an analogy. It's late, and I'm old and dumb.)

You might be interested to know that the wizards of Ankh-Morpork actually accidentally designed the platypus. They were trying to draw a duck, and did not realize that what they drew would actually come into creation... This is from Terry Pratchett's Discworld series, of course. It may be from 'Lost Continent'.
Pamgoosegirl9 on May 11th, 2005 06:33 am (UTC)
Uh, no worries, mate.
zvi LikesTVzvi_likes_tv on May 11th, 2005 01:06 pm (UTC)
I was reading either Blink or The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell (I read them fairly close together) and he summarized a study that showed that shaking one's head in agreement or disagreement influenced how believable a person felt a newsreport they were read was. Also, if one instructs a person on how to make a facial expression by moving their muscles, without explicitly telling them what kind of face they are making, it again influences their state of mind. So, while telling yourself you have energy and feel better may feel silly, you can impose beliefs and emotions on your self by making your body react in that way.

I mean, it seems just as silly that a pill can make some people stop being suicidally depressed, but that works too.

I wouldn't expect instant one time results from saying it once. But if you repeat it fifty times as you're dropping off to bed, you might feel better because you've told yourself you do.
bleu_lavandebleu_lavande on May 11th, 2005 02:42 pm (UTC)
Jack and Vaughn continue to do sluttish things in my head. I actually jotted dialogue notes on the back of an envelope over lunch.

Don't mind me and my camping gear, I'll be very quiet, I promise. Oh, and did I mention I have lollipops?
*sits and waits for the story*
Anna S.eliade on May 11th, 2005 04:36 pm (UTC)
*happy happy grin*

I have one potential reader, yay!

ruthless1ruthless1 on May 11th, 2005 04:40 pm (UTC)
"Fake it til you make it" kind of drives me insane to hear sometimes. But oddly enough - it has worked out with a number of different things. Like when I quit smoking - even though I didn't initially feel like a non-smoker - I told myself I was one until I actually became one. But gads - it's such a trite and annoying phrase.
I also did an affirmation (without even believing it) in 1986 after having three sinus infections (which required antibiotics) right in a row. Since then - I have been on anti biotics for my sinuses a total of TWO (yep count 'em) two times! One of the times was when I got a cold after a 4 hour surgery to put my damned ankle back inside my leg!
So. Words. They work. In odd and mysterious ways.
agartthaagarttha on May 11th, 2005 07:32 pm (UTC)
I wonder, whether you have tried yoga for the fatigue? There are certain poses designed especially for the problem, and I have heard from friends that they have benefited from it. I myself have tried yoga for mild depression, and more actively for a flat stomach, and yeah! me, it has worked wonders for both. I can now happily regard my flat belly!
agartthaagarttha on May 11th, 2005 07:34 pm (UTC)
Punctuation and world hunger, however, still boggle me.