I am sleepy and it's unfairly five o'clock. Sprint PCS commercials are trying to take over my mind. All my cultural observations come from TV commercials, from the profound--well, no profound ones yet--to the profoundly inane, like, "Rollitos? Why, I mean, why?"

Post-brunch, I've been tip-typing through my ficathon assignment and watching it snow. My TV is snowing, that is. And the people on my TV are staring at me. Earlier I took a shower, gave some serious thought to doing laundry, ignored laundry, lay down and thought about Spike, got up.

My life is divided into time spent on the couch and time not spent on the couch. It's a pretty good couch.

My favorite pizzeria does not have spaghetti and this is my small sadness of the day.

I celebrate my boringness! There will soon be a TV show about me starring Cordelia Chase and Steven Weber. Weber plays my psychotic next door neighbor who hears voices and bakes me muffins. There will also be an endearing puppy that will mysteriously disappear after three episodes.

You are feeling sleeeeeepy.