March 19th, 2004


random buffy content

Someone on TWOP made a list of "AU" or alternate characterizations and personalities on BtVS for people to vote on and choose their favorites. But the list was incomplete. I'm kind of an indexer of things, so I tried to think...more. The first list:

- Soldier Xander (Halloween)
- 18th-century Buffy (Halloween)
- Vamp Xander
- Vamp Willow
- Faith-as-Buffy
- Buffy-as-Faith
- Superstar Jonathan
- The Buffybot
- Randy Giles
- Joan the Vampire Slayer

But also:

- Amnesiac Giles & Anya
- Amnesiac Willow & Tara
- Hyena Xander
- Crazy "Real" Buffy (Normal Again)
- Scarred, kick-ass, bitter Buffy (The Wish)
- "Pet" Angel (The Wish)
- The Wishverse White Hats--Giles, Oz, Larry, Nancy
- Unhappily married Xander & Anya (shudder)
- Angelus
- Ripper
- But also, "Band Candy" Giles and Joyce
- "Gingerbread" Joyce
- "Zeppo" Xander, who really strikes me almost as a Xander personality distinct from anything else we ever saw in canon--wacky, getting-laid, saving-the-world, secretly-cool Xander, you know?
- Mind-reading Buffy
- InvisiBuffy
- Xander x 2 from "The Replacement"
- William ("Fool for Love," etc)
- Oz-as-werewolf
- Possessed Buffy & Angelus in "I Only Have Eyes for You"
- Eerie pod-Giles, Willow, etc (Bad Eggs)
- Darth Willow
- Darth Riley (no, come on, really--he had a dark phase)
- The passionate Spike-and-Buffy lovahs from Spike's dream that they re-ran in the previouslies, like, ten thousand million times

Okay, I'm just reaching now.

Qustions that every BtVS fan probably asks eventually, but which I still have no immediate answers to: Why don't more vampires go door-to-door like encyclopedia salesmen and wangle an entry? Then they can snack and relax in the privacy of someone else's home. And why in "The Real Me" couldn't Harmony's gang follow up their rock attack by shooting Xander et al through the door? Granted, they'd probably have to shoot Joyce dead in order to gain access to the house, but on this and other occasions--I'm thinking of times that Angel has been stymied by the invite barrier--it seems like vampires aren't taking full advantage of the possibilities open to them, like using guns and maybe big hooks to jerk people out?

When I start dwelling on these things I know it's time to go to lunch. Actually, when I start staring vacantly into space and contemplating the sore twinge in my left shoulder and the itch on my nose and the barking feeling in my stomach, I know it's time to go to lunch.

Time to go to lunch.