March 9th, 2003



When I did *not* cheat (and boy was this an easy one to cheat on), such were my results.

Hot Iowa Potato Boy.
Your boyfriend is Riley.
Who is your Buffy boyfriend?
brought to you by Quizilla

You are all *so* laughing at me, aren't you? Well, I don't care. He'd be a great boyfriend. Until he became a hooker or a suck-junkie or an Aryan zombie killer. My sweet little Iowa potato.

In other random "boyfriend" sound bytes, I just came across this quote: "It's so hard to find...people who crave intellectualism but also know how to have a good time. My fantasy man has always been a poet on a motorcycle." -- Lucinda Williams.

A poet on a motorcycle. Indeed. And no, I'm not shipping Spike/Lucinda. You people are just freaks. Freaks! Go away! La la la!

kinkiness in the evening

I was just walking by my television, which was talking to itself, and I noticed that Benny & Joon was on. Which reminded me that I do in fact have kinks that transcend het or slash. The caretaker kink, for one, which B&J really nails--without it even being romantic, because it's the brother who's the caretaker, so it's a kind of odd, triangulated kink--along with my nearly unspeakable "diminished capacity" kink (those of you who've read Jean Kluge's Changes will know what I mean).

Other het movies that push my buttons: White Palace, Once Around, Pretty Woman, Mumford, The Bodyguard, and Chances Are, the kinks in which revolve around disparate incomes and social class (White Palace, Pretty Woman, The Bodyguard), disparate ages (White Palace, Once Around), the caretaker kink again (The Bodyguard, Once Around), prostitution or the "kept woman" kink (Pretty Woman), and deep frickin' looniness (Mumford). Then there's Roxanne, which exemplifies what I'd call a "long-shot" kink, that is, where love between a princess and her fool grows despite all odds. A kink with many guises. Lust Over Pendle is a long-shot kink, because, I mean, *Neville*. Draco should *sneer* at him, but he doesn't, because the fool sometimes has what the price desperately wants and needs. That great story I just read, Montana, has a bit of the long-shot kink, and in fact I've seen hints of it in many NSync stories; Sentinel stories sometimes scratch around it, too. Xander is Spike's long shot, which is adorable. (And in fact Xander is Neville, and Spike Draco.) Spike might have been mistaken for Buffy's long shot, but...not quite. Because a long shot has to be essentially comical, even ridiculous in some way, and they never quite made Spike that, no matter how hard they tried. He had seductive power.

Diminished capacity = blindness (the most romantic of disabilities), regression to a childlike state (of trustful dependency, heartbreaking adoration, etc.), severe emotional brokenness (mm, tasty).

I've segued from het back to slash, I see. Just in time to rec Counting the Days by Dira Sudis, which just rocked my world off its axis today and sent it bouncing down a steep hill to land cracked and dazed at the base. If you want to talk kinks...Jesus. It makes my nerves shudder and my eyes glaze over just to think about it. Submission, fear, pain, trust--the many facets of emotional damage all rolled up and forced to yield to one master kink: caretaking in the guise of dominance.

Plus there's cuddling and fingernail-painting and nape-biting. Marking. Can it *get* any better than this? I am being superficial, because in truth the story is incredibly rich and complex, working through various shades of grief, and it's that kind of tapestry that makes kinks stand out like bright, brilliant threads. Also it gives great Dawn. I do admit that I'd expected a sharper and more erotic climax to the story--a big crashing thunderstorm of emotional catharsis. But it was still intense and deeply satisfying.

And so to circle back to the topic--clearly, when it comes down to it, kinks transcend everything. Sexual orientation, pairing. I mean, Angel/Spike is not my pairing of choice, but if it were, this is the kind of story that would make me fall and fall hard. The light brushstrokes that sketch out their background together--the training and the punishment, defiance and submission, unbelievable cruelty and survival--whoa.

Must go be quivery elsewhere now.


kinkiness redux

So, as I was just saying in chat, all I really need is to be able to turn on my TV and see Xander, circa season three, bent over a desk in the high school, gasping and face shocked as Spike nails him hard from behind--Xander's jeans thrust down around his thighs as Spike groans and rides him--Xander knocking stuff off the desk--staplers, books, pencil can--first trying to escape and then bracing himself and bucking back as Spike begins to dig deeper, seizes him and drags him upright, arm around his throat as Xander goes glassy-eyed and begins to come with wild, ecstatic spasms.

Joss could have all the money in my bank account if he'd find a way to film that, but somehow I don't think that'd do the trick.