Thank god this is a short week.
(And thank you, thank you, thank you to whoever gave me the free LJ time. Someone is a sweet little fairy with disposable income! I heart you, anonymous lover! :>)
bonibaru pointed out this interview with Joss Whedon, which is long and has some unusual areas of focus that I haven't seen elsewhere. I liked what he said about connection versus divisiveness. I also liked--and maybe this is ironically divisive of me, if you use two-camps theory on fandom to group everyone into spoilerphobes and spoilerphiles--but I liked his quote on the net and on spoilers:
But you know what? Not everybody reads spoilers, not everybody lives that way. Those are the people that really love the show. I cannot conceive of a person who wants to know what happens. People who turn to the last page of a book--what universe did they come from? I don't understand it.I know that will probably cheese some people off, and I don't want to start a pissing contest over who loves Buffy more based on where they fall on the spoiler continuum. Then again, my bemusement is pretty much the same as his. I don't get spoilerphilia--at least not as a defining habit. And when I do read spoilers, my behavior conforms to his theory, because it's only ever for things that I'm not passionate or obsessive about. I'll read Smallville spoilers, or people's comments on the new HP book, and it doesn't detract from what enjoyment I'm going to feel when I watch or read, because I have no real anticipation. My pleasure is of a more modest kind--it's the pleasure that comes from enjoying something your friends love. It's fannishness at a slight remove.
And Joss then goes on to say, more benignly:
That drives me crazy, but I think the Internet is beyond important in terms of fans communing, becoming a community and growing. People writing each other and writing fiction, and writing, well, porn. All of these things that do what I always wanted Buffy to do, which was exist outside of the TV show. Enter people's own personal ethos. The Internet has been a big part in how that has happened.Anyway. The interview has some interesting points.
My weekend has been a frelling waste of time as usual. I'm distracted by the efforts of sobriety, or distracting myself from them. I take small pleasures where I can, and try not to think about rum and coke.
Someone made a comment on my writing (you know who you are; don't feel bad!) about how my off-the-cuff pieces have been more engaging than my structured stuff. I have been feeling that too. I mean, Subtleties is a very different animal than my plotted, dialogue-heavy, ensemble stories, a different type of storytelling, so I don't really compare the two. But the recent Sidelines took so long to write that it when I was finishing it, I was just glad to be done. No real joy. And I am thinking about the next noir, but my interest is abstract. It's been so long, it's hard for me to re-engage, and I worry that anything I write will end up feeling routine. I feel passionate about nothing right now. And that makes me think of the Joss interview again, and how he described the burn-out of season three setting in. Of course, with my stuff, I'm the sole creator; I'm not part of a team, I'm not getting paid, I don't have any network commitments. I have readers, though. And that creates a sense of obligation. And I've said so much about the writing of noir that it feels like this big thing...it makes me rather queasy, actually, the sense of obligation and all the baggage that's piled up around it, and the work it would take to do ten more stories. I keep getting little twinges in my stomach as I write this.
I'm just broody today. And I feel a nagging angst surrounding my job, and my car, and other vague things, Seattle social things, and the everpresent "why can't I answer my e-mail" issue, and since I'm all about the addiction mindset, I want something to take me out of this rut, to *fix* things.
There is some suckage today.