Oh, man. I thought this was the finale and there's another week! I'm all a-perk. But here's what scares me--is it meta-commentary when Brian says, "Oh look, they cancelled 'Gay as Blazes'"? Because, nooooooo. No, no, no! Please, no.
The opening and the closing scenes were killers--Brian and Justin 4-evah! (Yes, I am twelve.) God. Justin is so fucking brave and principled, and Brian obviously adores him even if he does fight formal commitment kicking and screaming. What was that quote from him about having a boyfriend? "In a non-defined, non-conventional way," was it? Guh.
It was interesting that they left Stockwell's offer to Brian hanging without showing his refusal. That worries me a bit. (But how fucking hot did he look standing there in leather in Stockwell's office, rebel without a job? Jesus.) I think the advice he gave Justin was noteworthy and that he himself is feeling the bite of unemployment, the need for financial security. I don't rule out the possibility that he could admire Justin for taking a stand and then in next week's ep turn around and plug himself back into the system in a cynical way.
Ted and Emmett are killing me. I've only seen the last five eps or so of this season, but my god, the angst of them. It's all so fucked. I'd never have thought Ted would come to this after what he went through with the coma, with Blake. But his susceptibility is understandable too, his self-loathing recognizable and painful. When he's telling Em that he's never been more relaxed, never been happier and yet he's so fucking wound up he's nearly spitting the words out...I don't know. That just does me in. It's terrible. And Em, who was clear-eyed and even brutal about Blake, has turned helpless trying to deal with Ted's drug-fueled descent. Gah. It's sad, it's very sad.
But Ted has never looked hotter. He's right about one thing--he is beautiful, a beautiful fucked-up man.
Michael and Ben are a bit dull, aren't they? In that way some happy couples are. But they're such good guys and I'm happy for them, and it's nice to see Hunter *finally* start to make an effort.
It's hard to like Hunter, and that's obviously a deliberate choice of casting and ongoing characterization. That's the challenge he represents--helping someone who is hard to help but who is young enough to salvage. I'm anxious about him, and yet I wouldn't miss him if he were gone. It'd be easy to let him slip away. I wouldn't try nearly as hard as Michael and Ben--I wouldn't try at all, honestly. But I've known people like them and like Deb, and their goodness and effort are very real. They do exist in the world. That's what makes it so moving at times. I wish I thought that viewing QAF was making me more inclined to be a better person--actively, in the world--but I'm still just a consumer. If I identify with anyone on the show, it's Ted, disliking myself and looking for ways to be something else. That's kind of scary, really.
The interplay of Hunter and Brian and Justin cracks me up.
Brian and Justin, Brian and Justin...forever.