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21 November 2005 @ 08:56 pm
SGA: Poisoning the Well  

This is duller than it should be. Interesting idea, so-so execution. This ep really needs a B-plot. I remember being impressed the first time around that they let human experimentation with a terminally ill patient take place. I think that was when I briefly thought, "Wow, as a spin-off this is a darker universe than SG-1." I don't really think that now. The experimentation is still a cool plot point. It just doesn't compensate for everything else that's meh in the episode. It's a very Star Trekky episode, using a well-worn set of building blocks for its plot and character elements. I want newness! Also, one meta-joke about Carson as a present-day McCoy doesn't elevate his characterization, and a whole ep centered around him doesn't do much for me. Not when the plot developments are stock and predictable.

I'm so mean!

By the way, I said a week or two ago how I'd finished watching up through "The Lost Boys" and been disappointed, but I don't think I put that in context--I was only talking about the last five eps of the season to date, which I was catching up with. Not that I have much to say about it at this moment, mainly because I no longer remember in any detail what bugged me so much, but I just wanted to belatedly clarify that. Because I'm a deeply paranoid person and would hate to alienate all of fandom with a few careless words.

*mutters 'Mercury in retrograde' again*

PSA of the day: Don't eat popcorn after coating your shoulder with Ben-Gay...without having washed your hands thoroughly first. Not that I think anyone in the world but me would do something so lame. But still. I'm here as your example.
LadyStarlight: ewww alliteratorladystarlightsj on November 22nd, 2005 05:12 am (UTC)
I'm writing this down, because I would so do that. You're not alone!
Anna S.: james-marsterseliade on November 22nd, 2005 05:17 am (UTC)
Ha! Perfect icon! *grin*
flaming muse: mckaygenius newkidfanflaming_muse on November 22nd, 2005 10:25 am (UTC)
B-plot. Yes. Something *more*.

Although scenes with John and Steve (or any Wraith, really) make me happy. :)
Anna S.: john-intenseeliade on November 22nd, 2005 05:16 pm (UTC)
John taunting the Wraith--he's so cute. It's like he's been waiting all his life to be this dark and mean. Sometimes he really does impress me with this air of darkness, of course; other times I just want to pet his head.
Anna S.: dino-teetheliade on December 12th, 2005 02:41 am (UTC)
Steve the Wraith is awesome. "I'll call you...Steve." Or whatever he says--reminds me of Monty Python. "You may call me...Tim." Hee.
The Spikespike21 on November 22nd, 2005 10:25 am (UTC)
Thought #1: hmm I wonder what that tastes like...
Thought #2: Do we have any Ben Gay...?
Thought #3: Spike! Ewwww! Stop that!
Anna S.: dh-sleepyeliade on November 22nd, 2005 05:16 pm (UTC)
Give it to your cat. Cats love Ben-Gay. *sniff* And me. I mean, I love it. Cats only occasionally love me.
fluffybkittyfluffybkitty on November 22nd, 2005 12:23 pm (UTC)
Actually I did that not long back, or something similar at least. I'd pulled a muscle in my shoulder and liberally slathered it with Deep Heat and then, without thinking to wash my hands, ate a packet of crisps. Needless to say, it was nasty!
Anna S.: polarbeareliade on November 22nd, 2005 05:17 pm (UTC)
Helenhelenish on November 22nd, 2005 02:25 pm (UTC)
effing Poisoning the Well. I hate that episode for the following reasons:

1. Beckett, shudder.
2. Doing dangerous experiments with population's full and informed consent = so offensively unethical that you have to bring in Rodney McKay to be disgusted by it, just to show that it is BEYOND THE PALE.
3. Fucked up crazy torture and medical research on prisoners = just fine.
4. People even mentioning the Geneva convention = totally lame. Snortworthy.
5. John Sheppard = crappiest interrogator in the world, like, WHY oh WHY didn't they get Rodney down in there to just gab at him irritatingly until he told them stuff. He doesn't seem like the calmest guy in the world. Even John being laconic seems to bug him, I think Rodney McKay in full "I can't believe this sandwich is liverwurst, this is unbelievable, say, you know, don't you think having an organic ship is kind of a bad idea, I mean, it worked on Farscape I guess, but it seems prone to error, and I have to tell you your power systems don't seem to function at full capacity and I don't appreciate being in this cell, hey, you know, I got a blister last week and it was really painful and I might have sepsis--" mode would obviously be the way to go.

But mostly 2. And the fact that Rodney was only in the story as exposition and to be WILDLY DISGUSTED by people's BAD ETHICS.

and 6. Carson has no chin.

The only good part was when Perna showed up, and Sheppard, McKay AND Beckett all try to outcharm each other, like, what, there aren't any hot blonde scientists on Atlantis? WRONG. There's that German chick with the glasses. And Zelenka, frankly. Also, I enjoyed the painted backdrops. And, well, I sort of wish they went to worlds where it was the 19th century more often. And why don't they ever go anywhere where the ladies are in charge and treat John like he's sweet and pretty and shouldn't be carrying that gun?
Anna S.: john pretty!eliade on November 22nd, 2005 03:31 pm (UTC)
"I can't believe this sandwich is liverwurst, this is unbelievable, say, you know, don't you think having an organic ship is kind of a bad idea, I mean, it worked on Farscape I guess, but it seems prone to error, and I have to tell you your power systems don't seem to function at full capacity and I don't appreciate being in this cell, hey, you know, I got a blister last week and it was really painful and I might have sepsis--"

You crack me up madly. You bring the love, baby.

And yeah, there was almost no Rodney in this, and Carson has no chin. *Sigh.*

And why don't they ever go anywhere where the ladies are in charge and treat John like he's sweet and pretty and shouldn't be carrying that gun?

"The pretty ones can wait in the salon," Zigga said, taking Rodney's arm to lead him into the council chamber.

"But wait--" Rodney looked back over his shoulder, struggling between the implied insult there and the compliment of being chosen for hot diplomatic action while John looked on in dismay.

Helenhelenish on November 22nd, 2005 06:32 pm (UTC)
"The pretty ones can wait in the salon," Zigga said, taking Rodney's arm to lead him into the council chamber.

"But wait--" Rodney looked back over his shoulder, struggling between the implied insult there and the compliment of being chosen for hot diplomatic action while John looked on in dismay.

By the end of the negotiations he wasn't bothered about it much - who cared about the fascist and highly inaccurate standards of beauty on M3X-463, anyhow, when there was naquadah to be cunningly traded for broken radio parts? He expected to spend a fulfilling evening lording his superior trading ability over John - after all, not one person had tried to shoot or kidnap him during the entire six hour session, but John only smiled at him and said "That's nice," and undid another button on his shirt. Which was shiny.

"Where'd you get that?" Rodney said.

"They gave it to me," John said. "Nice, don't you think?"

"Yeah, great," Rodney said, digging through his back to find his floss. There had been sort of stringy beer nuts to commemorate the beginnings of peaceful trading.

"You don't like it?" John said quietly.

"Are you on drugs?" Rodney said, and took his floss in the bathroom. He only managed to get through the top row of teeth before opening the door, taking one look at John's crumpled face for confirmation, and saying, "You're on drugs, right?"

"You don't think I look good?" John said. His hands were fisted, white-knuckled, in the bedspread.

"Oh, Christ," Rodney said. "Fuck."
Anna S.: john-floaty-dotseliade on November 22nd, 2005 07:58 pm (UTC)
"You don't think I look good?" John said. His hands were fisted, white-knuckled, in the bedspread.

"Oh, Christ," Rodney said. "Fuck." When John's puppy-eyed dismay didn't change, he added, "Good, yes. Very good, Colonel."

The other man's smile returned like a cat sliding out hesitantly from under a bed. "John."

"Say again? Oh, right. What did they give you?" He went over and leaned down to inspect the damage, sniffing as if that would tell him something. Maybe it would.

"Some sort of beer nuts--"


"--and some beer. It tasted funny."

"I'm sure it did. Because it was laced with *happy* juice."

"Happy," John said, smiling up at him like a dork. His shirt was almost entirely unbuttoned now.
Helenhelenish on November 22nd, 2005 08:41 pm (UTC)

"What's wrong with him?" Zigga said, peering past Rodney to John, who was staring at himself in the mirror dreamily.

"What's--look at him," Rodney said, trying to keep his voice calm and rational and Elizabeth-like. "Look, I don't know what kind of crazy planet this is where you drug people so they'll have sex with you, and I understand this might have been kindly meant, but just because I don't happen to fit your, I have to say, narrow cultural expectations for attractiveness doesn't mean I can't get laid without drugging someone, and it's very--it's not done, in our culture, to--um--to--

"Rodney thinks I'm pretty," John said gravely, rolling over on the bed, his pants sliding down his hips.

"Yes," Zigga said. He didn't look like someone who went around putting roofies in people's drinks. He looked tired and attentive and diplomatic, like the sort of person who had hosted negotiated an intergalactic treaty and would really prefer to go back to his house and eat a cheese sandwich and go to sleep. Rodney had liked him a lot until John had demanded that Rodney touch the nape of his neck because the skin was soft there.


"He said so three times. Four times," John said.

"Nothing seems wrong here, to you," Rodney said, giving up on the Elizabeth-voice entirely. "Business as usual."

"Well, his conceptual grasp of numbers is impressive," Zigga said. "But I suppose it did surprised me that you'd bother to bring him along on a diplomatic mission. Forgive me, but it doesn't seem as though he has a lot to add to the discussion."

"Except that I have a nice mouth," John said. "for talking with."
Anna S.: john-sultryeliade on November 22nd, 2005 09:30 pm (UTC)
"I can also whistle," he added, this obviously just occurring to him. He proved his ability with a series of tuneless chirps. Rodney, who had a tin ear himself, was nonetheless able to recognize it as "Camptown Races."

"Our companions practice similar lip-strengthening exercises," Zigga said to Rodney. "He seems well trained."

Rodney gaped. He wasn't often at a loss for words, but this was so...sordid. And unexpected. If this had been a sitcom, the circumstances might have been wacky, but the thought of how Sheppard would react when he recovered kind of killed any wack quotient. Rodney could tell that Zigga was at an equal loss. The man's careful politeness suggested no way to bridge the culture gap.

"When will he recover?" Rodney snapped angrily.

"He should be fine by morning." Zigga cleared his throat. "His response to the upavo is not typical. Most people are only mildly intoxicated. The drink is intended to soothe companions during times of stress--such as a journey to a strange world. They get so high-strung."

"High-strung," John said affably, smiling at them in the mirror. "Hey--do you guys have any more of those little beer nuts?"
Helenhelenish on November 22nd, 2005 09:54 pm (UTC)
[hah! oh, damn, now it's my turn. Also, I was going to make this just a planet where the genetically pretty are also congenitally dumb, something to do with the air, but I like where you're going, too.]
Anna S.: rodney-happy-smileeliade on November 22nd, 2005 09:55 pm (UTC)
Oh, you could make them dumb too! I don't think that's necessarily contraindicated. *g*
Anna S.eliade on November 22nd, 2005 10:07 pm (UTC)

Zigga took one last look at John and sighed. "His response to the upavo is regrettable, and I truly apologize--still, it's interesting, perhaps even worthy of study. If the drink raised the intelligence of our own companions in such a way, we'd surely have to prohibit it. But of course," he added hastily, "I'm sure it's a simulated affect."
Anna S.: john pretty!eliade on November 22nd, 2005 10:08 pm (UTC)
(Effect, even. *sigh*)
Helenhelenish on November 22nd, 2005 10:57 pm (UTC)
The thing was, it didn't really wear off very much at all, and Rodney spent the night with John cuddled up against his back, dozing happily, one hand tucked into the band of Rodney's underwear, and then had to dissuade John from taking a shower with him in the morning.

“But I’m supposed to wash your back,” John said, perched on the counter, watching through the frosted glass door.

“I’m fine,” Rodney said. It was a great shower, with six different nozzles blasting ridiculously hot water and a smooth marble floor. He closed his eyes and stuck his face in the blast.

“I always take a shower with you,” John said, pressing his face against the door and staring disconsolately through the glass.

“No, you don’t,” Rodney said, but in the end he just let John in, because they were both naked anyway, and his energy for wrangling with John was at low ebb, mostly from spending the night waking up every time John had sighed against his neck and rubbed what Rodney resolutely decided was not his dick against Rodney’s ass.

He had planned to leave for Atlantis right after that, or at least after he managed to convince John to put on more than some small and oddly shiny shorts that he had gotten from god knows where, but Pergata had abundant wheat and an array of basic medical supplies they seemed eager to trade, and it was apparently very rude for a diplomat to leave before negotiations had been completed.

"Maybe if I just send John home," Rodney suggested. He was watching John playing in the crescent-shaped swimming pool in front of the breakfast pavilion, tumbling around and splashing in the water with a young blond tanned guy, so he missed the way Zigga's face hardened.

"He's displeased you?"

"What? No, he's--pleasing. obviously," Rodney said awkwardly.

"It would be a shame to kill a companion who seems so devoted to you."

"Oh," Rodney said. "Well, going through the gate doesn't kill--oh. um. I see."

"I suppose," Zigga said, "we could find someone else to take him. He's a little older than we usually--well," he paused, watching John wave at Rodney until he had his attention and then launch himself into a dive off the edge of the pool. “On the other hand—-“

"No one's taking him,” Rodney said. “I’ll keep him.”

“He has been with you for quite some time, I'd imagine,” Zigga said. “Your fondness for him is commendable.”

“Yeah, I’m a prince,” Rodney said.

Anna S.: rodney-happy-smileeliade on November 22nd, 2005 11:19 pm (UTC)
Teyla seemed to be doing okay with her pet Ronon. Though, to Rodney's mind, Ronon wasn't much dopier than usual.

"I've seen this substance used before on other worlds," Teyla had said with enviable equanimity. "Its effects can vary widely, but even at its strongest, it should not last more than a few days. I would not worry." And then she'd smiled as if she knew a secret, which was not at all reassuring.

"You don't think we should, I don't know, *worry* more?" he'd said a bit hysterically, waving a hand at John, who'd been loping around picking flowers in the sunshine, on his way to some kind of alien pretty-boy volleyball game. "If it were me, I'd want you to worry more. Just for future reference."

But her smile defeated Rodney, so here he was, a morose spectator to John's dolphin-like pool play.

Eventually John got out and shook spatters of water on Rodney's shirt and filched fruit from his plate, still drippy. Drippy and happy. "I like you," Rodney said to John, sparing a pointed look for Zigga, "I really like you, and I don't want to kill you, but you're getting me wet. Stop it."

"Sorry." John kissed his ear.
Alizarin_NYC: sheppardalizarin_nyc on November 23rd, 2005 03:50 am (UTC)
Awww. More please.
Helenhelenish on November 23rd, 2005 05:23 am (UTC)
"No kissing," Rodney said firmly, and John ignored him and let his mouth slide down Rodney’s ear to his neck, hit the little hot spot above his collar bone Rodney had pretty much forgotten about, lingered, warm soft mouth. Rodney flinched sideways and threw an arm up, catching John’s shoulder, and John overbalanced, twisted sideways, and sat down hard on the ground.

“I——John, I’m sorry,” Rodney said, into the silence. Everyone was very carefully not looking at him, and John’s eyes were huge with hurt.

“Why did you do that?”

“It was an accident,” Rodney said.

“But I just wanted—-did I do something wrong?” John said softly.

“No,” Rodney said.

”Don’t I make you happy?”

“Get up,” Rodney hissed. John pressed his lips together, and did it, slowly, shoulders hunched. “Are you hurt?” John shook his head. Rodney sighed and rubbed his face, and when he looked up John was still standing forlornly next to his chair. “I’m sorry,” Rodney said. “Do you want to go back to play in the pool?”

“Can I stay with you in the negotiations?” John said.

“Well, I can’t—-“

“He’s welcome, if he can be quiet,” Zigga said. He was smiling past Rodney at John, and John smiled tentatively back.

“Fine,” Rodney said, which meant that he spent the rest of the afternoon discussing wheat yields with John tucked up against him in his chair, cheek pressed to his shoulder, one hand underneath Rodney’s shirt, wrapped over his ribs. No one else seemed to notice.
Anna S.: john-floaty-dotseliade on November 23rd, 2005 05:43 pm (UTC)
At the end of the afternoon, Rodney didn't know much more about wheat yields--he'd been too distracted to hit "save" on the conversational details, but no loss, he needed that valuable mental storage space for things of real importance anyway--but he knew the way John's hand felt, an intimate eternal revelation. He felt branded. He wasn't sure it was a good feeling. He didn't need this.

When Zigga left them on some personal business, Rodney tried to shift out from under the blanket of John's sleepy weight, but didn't get very far.

"Did anyone ever tell you you're distracting, Colonel?"

"I'm being quiet," John said, and it didn't matter that he was telling the truth, he sounded like someone's five-year-old on a mall trip, and that was pushing it for Rodney.

"Yes, you're very good," he said, his attempt at a patient tone coming out elaborately pained. He patted John's arm to make up for it, which just made John snuggle more. "I swear I think you're regressing further every minute."

John dredged up a scrap of lucidity to say, "I'm not. I'm perfectly fine. Just go with the flow, Rodney."

"I *would*, but this flow leads right over the Reichenbach Falls, sending us both plummeting to our doom."

"They have really big chairs here. I like them."

Rodney cast his eyes to the heavens with a look of disgusted accusation that John probably didn't see. "Maybe we can bring you back one."

"Cool." John stretched against him, slung one leg a bit further into Rodney's personal space, and lifted his face enough to peer into Rodney's eyes. "You want a neck rub?"

"Excuse me? No. That's inappropriate behavior. Like kissing and stroking and--other things that you've been doing."

"I bet it'd relax you."

"I'm sure it would. And I'm equally sure that I should stay vigilant."

John glanced around at the palatial lawns and gardens, which were turning golden, brushed with the idyllic light of a setting sun. "It's not like anyone's going to attack us here," he pointed out mildly.

Caught by the way the light spoked John's eyes and fingered his lashes, Rodney didn't immediately reply. He swallowed once, then gathered himself. "I'm staying vigilant against attacks from within." Did his voice sound unsteady?

John laughed and then, quite horribly, tickled him.
Thornthornsilver on November 23rd, 2005 06:30 pm (UTC)
This is gorgeous!
Anna S.: puppy-eyeseliade on November 23rd, 2005 08:44 pm (UTC)
*beams a thank you*
astolatastolat on November 23rd, 2005 07:05 pm (UTC)
*squeaks with joy*
Anna S.: john-floaty-dotseliade on November 23rd, 2005 07:49 pm (UTC)
You're kind--I say that on behalf of my entries, anyway, especially as I just noticed a dumb mistake I wish I'd caught. I understand the logic against being able to edit comments, but... *bites lip* ...it can be so painful.
Helenhelenish on November 23rd, 2005 07:52 pm (UTC)
word. every time it gets thrown back to me I get this paralyzed "There's a ball in my court! What do I do! Hit it! or something! Or, AIEE!" emotion.

Anna S.: john-rodney-intenseeliade on November 23rd, 2005 07:55 pm (UTC)
Oh, you can stop anytime, I swear! I won't hurt you. :)


Helenhelenish on November 23rd, 2005 08:13 pm (UTC)
MEAN. Also, I still have some thoughts about this, and John hasn't even tried really, really hard to have sex with Rodney yet, which sadly might have to wait until tonight, since I'm trying to weasel out of work early.

Also, that icon is makes me freak out with joy.
inappropriately bibliophilicraucousraven on November 24th, 2005 12:48 am (UTC)
You and eliade are making me freak out with joy.
(Deleted comment)
Anna S.: john-rodney-intenseeliade on November 23rd, 2005 08:43 pm (UTC)
If you're asking about this one, I'm actually not sure--blimey_icons made it. If you find out, let me know. ;)
Furiusfurius on November 24th, 2005 11:47 pm (UTC)
The icon's based on an screencap from Trinity.

Just want to say, that's the best comment fic I've ever read. Thank you. It's just utterly adorable. I want to coo at it.
Helenhelenish on November 25th, 2005 03:35 pm (UTC)

Zigga came back while Rodney was still wheezing and slapping at John’s hands, stopped in the doorway, one hand on the doorknob, and stared at them. Rodney yanked his shirt back down and pushed himself up on his elbows and tried a politely bland smile – as politely bland as he could with John still on top of his thighs, pinning him down.

“My apologies,” Zigga said. “Do you require—-privacy?”

“Yes,” John said.

“No, no,” Rodney said. “No. No, in fact, although I—-we-—I appreciate the offer.”

“It’s no trouble,” Zigga said. “This room won’t be used for the rest of the day.”

“That’s very kind of you—-“ Rodney began, but Zigga had already closed the door firmly behind him, and John said,

“About time,” and pushed him back down in the chair and kissed him.

“No kissing,” Rodney said, tried to say, but John had his tongue in his mouth, so it just made it seem as though he were participating in the kiss, which he wasn’t. “No kissing, I said,” he said again, a little breathlessly, when John lifted his mouth.

“That was on the neck,” John said, propping himself up on an elbow and unzipping the top of Rodney’s shirt.

“No,” Rodney said, clearing his throat. “No, it wasn’t. It was a blanket rule, for my entire person. No kissing, all over. No kissing.”

“All over?” John said, one lazy finger sliding down Rodney’s throat, over his chest.

“That’s—-yes, right,” Rodney said. He grabbed John’s hand before it could go anyplace else, but John just smiled a little dreamily at him and laced his fingers through Rodney’s.
Anna S.: john-rodney-intenseeliade on November 25th, 2005 06:39 pm (UTC)
The smile, that gesture--how could something so sweet be so insufferable? "You know, when I said you were an intergalactic slut in the tradition of Captain Kirk, I didn't really think I'd be included in your multitude of conquests."

"You talk a lot."

"You noticed. I'm touched. Deeply touched. And by that I mean stop touching me. *There*!"

John took on the mutinous, tight-lipped expression of a small boy being kicked out of a too-adult conversation. But he had hair like Daffy Duck and he was high as a kite, so it was hard for Rodney to take him all that seriously. That was his plan anyway, to take him very unseriously and to put him to bed--*alone*--to sleep this off, but John kissed him again and Rodney couldn't extricate himself without causing serious damage.

He was pretty sure that would be a convincing excuse when charges were filed. Plus, John was humming happily into his mouth and doing things that might have been lip exercises. How could Rodney be blamed? He'd been extremely forbearing, but there was only so much tickling and nibbling a man could take before he retaliated. Or possibly surrendered. He grabbed the back of John's neck and held him more firmly in place so that he could express his displeasure...with kisses.

At some point during his nonverbal complaints, his shirt became entirely unzipped and he felt John skimming both hands, hmm, around his chest and then down his sides, back into the tickle zone. Rodney tensed, but relaxed again when John's hands remained gentle.

John broke off kissing--he was definitely the one driving here--and Rodney's head lolled back against the chair as if his strings had been cut. "Stop, please, you must stop," he said with ragged breaths, flatly, as if reciting lines from a bad script. John gave him a puzzled look. "One last stab for plausible deniability," Rodney said, managing a small hand wave. "Carry on."

He was aware of himself lounging like a king on his throne, head back, hands loose on the arms of the chair, John perched on his lap like a harem boy, then John slithered off and settled to the ground with a soft thump, and gave the lightest push to Rodney's inner thighs, which splayed open.

"I'm so corruptible," Rodney breathed in a rush of truth to himself and apology to John, and wished this wasn't happening in a room with lewd cherubs on the ceiling, which just made it all the more tawdry.
Helenhelenish on November 25th, 2005 10:00 pm (UTC)
[this next bit is going to be short, because I'm lame, and because family obligations call. sorry! lame!]
Helenhelenish on November 25th, 2005 10:00 pm (UTC)
John kissed his knee, through his pants, and then pressed his cheek against Rodney’s thigh, eyes closed.

“I like you,” he said, sighed really, nuzzling in until he was rubbing his face against Rodney’s zipper, and Rodney’s stomach dropped like perhaps his half naked commanding officer was going to suck him off and maybe a little bit like realizing that he was a terrible person.

John knelt up a little and popped open the button on Rodney’s pants with his teeth. Rodney squeezed his eyes closed and when he opened them John was edging his zipper down, smiling to himself, fingers dipping inside, stroking the worn cotton of Rodney’s underwear. It was--it--John rubbed his thumb up the flap and worked open the tiny button, and--

“I can’t let you do this,” Rodney said, quickly, before he lost his nerve.

“Sure you can,” John said, and brushed a series of businesslike kisses against Rodney’s stomach. “Maybe I can fuck you, after.”
Anna S.: john pretty!eliade on November 25th, 2005 11:13 pm (UTC)
"This can't be a good idea. I mean, seriously." He struggled to a sitting position but John palmed his stomach and forced--at least a joule's worth of force was exerted--him back. It wouldn't do to stop talking though, and Rodney ignored the fingers teasing his fly, talking as fast as he could. "I can list a dozen reasons off the top of my head why this is bad and wrong, starting with the fact that I'm not gay, you're not gay, you're in the military and on drugs, I'm on your team, and then the--stop that--the inevitable morning after, the shouting matches and grim silences, the guilt, shame, regret, and--"

"Wow. How do you ever get laid?"

"I don't," Rodney snapped, trying to bat away John's wandering hand, which was like some kind of warm lustful sea crab with a mind of its own.

"That's sad," John said, sounding like he meant it, like he wanted to do Rodney endless friendly favors. He sounded like Keanu Reeves as the Buddha. "I'm going to suck you off now."

"Right." Rodney's breath was swelling up from some deeper well, his thigh muscles flexing with nerves and a desire to tighten around John and hold him in place. He was so hard he couldn't believe he was still talking. "Oh no."

John mouthed his boxers, where the cotton was stretched to the bursting point, and then popped a snap, and then another, freeing him.
Doctor Science: dude! suzvoymecurtin on November 27th, 2005 01:38 am (UTC)
and you stop *NOW*?!? I'm almost as frustrated as poor Rodney!
Anna S.: rodney-sheikeliade on November 27th, 2005 05:56 am (UTC)
But, but...it isn't my turn!

Helenhelenish on November 27th, 2005 09:13 pm (UTC)
(whoops, meant to reply here):

It's my turn! But I need all my blowjob imagery for the crazy wraith sex slave drug story I'm writing even AS WE SPEAK.

Anna S.: cat_chickeneliade on November 27th, 2005 10:27 pm (UTC)
Um...how can I say this...YES OH GOD YES. Save that imagery, yes please, and channel it into the crazy wraith sex slave drug story and I'll just be over here staring at you, waiting. See icon.
kudrakudra2324 on November 29th, 2005 04:55 am (UTC)
like some kind of warm lustful sea crab with a mind of its own.


(sorry, i just couldn't resist a comment on that :)).
Alex the Eccentric: Pretty Radek by jeepnyeccentric_alex on December 8th, 2005 01:25 am (UTC)
*flails a whole bunch* OMG BEST COMMENT FIC EVER!! And completely unexpected- I was just bippin' along and pow, fic! Whee! This totally needs to be a)finished and b)reposted somewhere whole so that I don't have to copy and paste half of it to somewhere else because the width is getting tiny. Please?
Anna S.: dino-rodney-pianoeliade on December 12th, 2005 02:03 am (UTC)
Well, Helen gave permission for me to mess with it some more, so I hope to do that sometime and to post a cleaner copy. Thank you so much! :D
Devil Dolldevildoll on November 29th, 2005 01:09 am (UTC)
Wow. I don't even remember how I got here, but I heartily approve of this.

Between the shower thing and the flower picking, I am dead of cute.