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16 August 2005 @ 12:25 pm
letters to the universe  
Dear God,

You misheard me. I said that I liked the Charlie's Angels remake, not that I wanted a Charlie's Angels make-over. You are no longer allowed to play with my hairdryer.

Love, Anna

***

Dear Sister Waxing of No Mercy,

When I said I wanted my eyebrows "thinned", implicit in this request was a wish that my eyebrows would still exist afterwards. In some form. My apologies for not being explicit. I realize it's a nuance. The vestigial lumps above my eyes make an interesting statement, though. Such as, "I was playing with the flamethrower again."

Yours, Anna

***

Dear Godiva,

I lost my soul to Satan through the temptation of chocolate. Please reimburse me for the cost of one (1) soul, in the amount of $100 billion dollars and the boundless joy of an infinite afterlife. If I don't hear from you by end of day tomorrow, my lawyers will be in touch.

Sincerely, Anna

***

GIP!
 
 
 
abbyleeabbylee on August 16th, 2005 07:54 pm (UTC)
I refused to ever get my eyebrows waxed because I could not trust anyone to understand that I want eyebrows like women from the 1940s. (I think.) That is, I want them to be there and natural, I just want them to be thinner and shaplier. I would rather have my natural eyebrows (which are Russian enough to need help, but aren't crazy) than have them too plucked. (Thankfully, my hairless sister introduced me to the girl who does her manicures and I fell in love.)

I mostly don't care who does my bikini wax but few are allowed near by brows :)
alittlebritonalittlebriton on August 16th, 2005 08:47 pm (UTC)
Let me know how that last one works out for you. Mine failed due to a legal loophole.
(Deleted comment)
Mayhem Parva: Clark hooray (livia_penn)raincitygirl on August 17th, 2005 12:31 am (UTC)
Bwahahahahaha!
Dittostretfordditto on August 17th, 2005 03:31 pm (UTC)
:D